Where’s the playbook covering teenage advice for parents. Everyone warns us about the terrible two’s but a toddler does not match the strife caused once children hit puberty. Your precious children change from idolizing your every move to leaving you in the dust. Everything is suddenly about them - their friends, their phone, their facebook. Parents respond by preaching nagging and threatening, often causing teens to feel less respected and become insolent or withdrawn. It is a never ending cycle. Though it is impossible to avoid the tug of war, you can make the days smoother with communication.
Encourage Activities for Personal Growth
Encourage Activities for Personal Growth- Teens maintain a more positive attitude when they participate in activities that allow for personal expression. Extra curricula activities like art programs, sports or band help teens find value in themselves. Evidence has also shown teens who participate in community service engage in less risky behaviors and receive higher grades. Allow teens to get a part- time job. It will teach them important skills for the future such as accountability, time and money management, the ability to communicate effectively and be on time.
Build a Close Relationship
Build a Close Relationship – Teens are persuaded by the people they spend time with the most. By spending time, parents contribute the most powerful impact on a child’s attitude, behavior and life approach. Form close bonds by making family dinners a time to connect. Talk to your teen about issues that are important to them such as school or their friends. Resist the urge to be a know-it-all. Instead actively listen to their opinions and reflect what they are saying back to them so they are aware you value their thoughts. Teens with a close bond to their parents are proven to do better academically and engage in less destructive behavior.
Monitor Media
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Monitor Media- According to a report by the Council of Economic Advisors teens spend 7 ½ hours each day exposed to media from tv, the internet, video games, and magazines. Teens who spend more time plugged in, are more distant from their parents. Consider restricting tv time during designated times or days and use the time to do a mutually enjoyable activity together. Use tv time to connect with your teen. Watch their favorite show with them and after the show is over ask their opinion about situations viewed. It is a wonderful way to hear their perspective, discuss uncomfortable issues, and teach.
Provide structure
Provide structure- Teens may act unhappy when you lay down house rules. Have realistic expectations for your teen to meet such as good grades, completing chores, and curfews. In reality teens understand expectations and realize boundaries show you care about them.
Allow Teenagers to Make Decisions
Allow Teenagers to Make Decisions- It is normal for teens to adopt their own values about life and form their own opinions. Listen to them when they have a problem and ask them how they would solve the problem. Offer guidance but allow them to make mistakes as like as it is a safe environment. By giving teens reasonable freedom to make mistakes so they can prepare to solve future dilemmas.
Grant Privacy
Grant Privacy – Good teenage advice for parents is to give teens privacy. Giving them their own space shows you trust them. Though you should always know where they are going with whom and when they are returning there is no reason to ask about every detail. You cannot be with your teen at all times, instead keep tabs on their activities to make sure they are safe. Respect their privacy unless they do something that makes you have to revoke those freedoms.
Paul Beard
http://www.familylifepage.com