Parenting today in a modern and complex world has never been a walk in the park for many parents. Many parents find it a very challenging matter to bring up children from a young age to a grown up stage. The world is no longer how it used to be. The good old days are long gone and can't be caught up with again. The evolution of new lifestyles and practice is slowly and gradually affecting children today. The new trends in fashion industry and the creation of new celebrities with the lifestyles that accompanies it even complicates the equation further, but no matter how things have changed, there are still certain tips which can help parents today to shape the lives of their children.

Build Parent to Child Relationship

This can be affected by finding avenues of drawing your children near you as possible. This can be done by setting a daily time with your children to do some fun things together. Watching a good program together with your children can be a plus to draw you together. Both parents should participate in this program to bring an equal responsibility concept at home. Playing with your children can go a long way to break any ice. Such programs will help both parents and children to break barriers between them.

Effective Parenting "3Fs"

a). Firm: Parents must be very firm when dealing with children once a rule is broken. You should be able to stick to the agreed disciplinary actions. When the child has broken a rule, enforce the action without compromising.

b). Fairness: The action done against the breakage of the rule should be seen to be fair. The punishment involved should not be too harsh for the children, but done fairly with love and friendliness. Children should be explained the consequences they can expect when they do wrong always.

c). Friendly: Be firm when explaining to children any mistake they have done, but also be friendly when doing so to foster a good relationship with them always.

The Parent to Be Coach/Teacher

A parent's role in a family is that of a life coach or a teacher. You must always lead by example to your children. Explain in details what is expected of them. This can be done by giving specific instructions to children on what is expected of them. See to it that they do it very diligently. Do a follow up to ascertain that your instructions are being followed accurately. Always encourage them whenever they have done well, but be friendly when criticizing so that they aren't discouraged altogether.

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Positive Parenting Rewards

Reward your children when they do well in any aspect. Daily motivations and a rewards system will encourage them to do even better. Foster and create that environment at home. Children will respond positively towards this system to make good behaviors. It might seem just like any ordinary thing in the beginning but soon it will start shaping them. Rewards can be done in kind and in other ways. When children do something better for example, they can get praise or a hand clap, or even be allowed to go to play once they finish their homework or something similar. Rewards can also be done through some gifts like a lollipop or any other gift to encourage them.

Always Praise for an Achievement

Make sure that you always praise your child or children whenever they have achieved something good. Every good step the child makes in life should be followed with praise. Reward systems can also go hand in hand with this action. This process will make a child develop some pleasant character in that line. When this process continues for a long time especially in the formative stages, the child will grow in that perspective to always do things better. Children will know that every good behavior, achievement, and character earns rewards both physical and in kind even in society.

Good Listening Skills

As a parent you must develop very good listening skills towards your children. This can be done by getting to their level of understanding issues. Always maintain the eye contact to understand your children. Listen carefully and constructively when they try to explain anything. Ask them very constructive and open questions which don't require just a yes or no. The questions should be practical such that they explain with words. Try to be kind and not interrupting when they are talking. Respond by saying back to them the words they have spoken.

There are many skills and tips which today's parents can adopt to shape their children's lives. However more learning and open mindedness will help them to understand many skill and tips. Parents can learn from each other and share their skills and experiences. They can also do more learning from relevant materials like good books, internet research and many more avenues available today. Attending parental advisory workshops, seminars, and symposiums can also help a great deal to have effective parenting.

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Paul Beard
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Paul Beard

Executive Director at LIGHTHOUSE 2911
Paul A. Beard has designed programs and written several information guides and books about parents and families.
http://www.familylifepage.com
Paul Beard
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Effective Parenting Tips and Skills
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